How do I explore without disrupting my default world?

DEAR COLETTE:
How do I explore without disrupting my default world?
What are the appropriate boundaries we need to draw in life?
Why do I keep falling into perversity (and feeds my curiosity about this rabbit hole)?
–SD

DEAR SD: This is actually a good and hard question to answer. It’s good in that I think this is a question that many (men) wrestle with. And it’s hard to answer because every situation is so nuanced and I actually don’t have any details from you to go off of. For instance, when you say you have a default world and you don’t want to disrupt it as you explore, I’m assuming this means that you have a significant other who isn’t privy to your kinky desires. And when you ask “why do I keep falling into perversity?” it feels like you’re not quite at ease with the fact that you have these perversions. I’m also going to to assume that you’re a man and your partner is a woman. And I’m just going to guess that you want to cross-dress and try strap-on oral worship. Of course, these are all assumptions I’m gleaning from your word choice and my own observations and pattern-matching, so I can be entirely wrong.

But it sounds to me like you have these kinky fantasies that you want to explore but you don’t want to share them with your s.o. because you don’t want them to know about said fantasies.

If that’s the case, you have a few choices. First you have to decide whether or not you want to keep your worlds separate or not. Essentially, do you want to hide or share your perversions?

 

Hide My Perversions

 

Share My Perversions