Thank you

For taking the time

To write to me

I promise

I will take that time

To write back to you..

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Dear Colette,

I want to be a dominatrix. I found myself crying about you crying in response to a girl’s question on your website. I was crying because I realized I needed to find you in this space, that I have been looking for this for a long time and didn’t know who or where to go to.

I went down the rabbit hole. How did I find you? I was following lovetouchpoint.

You see, I used to be a sub to my lover for 10 years, who I was cheating with…. because I was married. And I had a sexless marriage that had a huge foundation of Maslow’s hierarchy. But above that… this lover satisfied the other needs. But above that, I was not being taken care of with Aftercare. I was also lying and planning in secret. 

I left both of them after 10 years… I couldn’t do it anymore. I had to live in integrity. But I didn’t know I was carrying so much sadness, guilt and trauma for so long…  
I lost my job, I went to Burning Man, I separated from my two partners and went to become a nomad for the past 3+ years. 

I met my partner whilst traveling. Since then we’ve been traveling 2+ years together working on creating content for an intimacy app. And, we are in an open relationship. But, this whole time we played in the dom sub context, and open related, and got triggered left and right. I was, starting to feel like my needs didn’t matter. He started to hide things from me or withhold things on me. I once found him on dating apps and didn’t share any information about me in his life. He still won’t  tell people he matches with that he has a gf until he meets them on their first date. But this all started to happen when I started to be submissive not only in the bedroom, but also in the rest of our context. I gave and I gave. I gave even money. I gave even my devotion. I started to not want to relate to anyone else but him, because I felt like I didn’t want to be with anyone else but only focus on our intimacy as a couple.

Just writing this I am starting to feel sad that I am this way now. 

Recently he told me he doesn’t feel interested in having sex with me as much because he feels like I am pressuring him. He also feels like we have sex only this one way, and that he wants to connect with other women who are “more confident” and more willing to take a lead, and more willing to know how she wants to “fuck in the bedroom”. That killed me. I mean, open relating sure – but because he’s looking for someone more confident than me… rather than encouraging and investing in how WE can be more engaged in our sex (perhaps ask me or encourage me to express my needs). Perhaps it’s too much work or it’s not sexy to have someone encourage me to be more assertive in bed, but am I supposed to practice with others instead of with him? Am I the one that needs to be fixed if he has to look else where instead of investing with me? Why can’t I be the one saying, “wait why don’t you at least first try with me together…?”

But, the anger and the desire to speak up and hear my own voice instead of hear it in my head, is what I truly want/desire. I am withering away a bit, feeling more heartbroken every day as I find myself swallowing my triggers because I don’t know how to speak up. I am tired of feeling this way. I am tired of not being able to feel exactly the kind of intimacy and pleasure that I want in bed. I am tired of being told things of this nature, “I’d love to see you take control in the bedroom, but I can’t surrender to the kind of person you are now. You need to work on your confidence.” 

I am tired.

I am so tired.

And I am crying.
AND I AM READY TO BE A DOMINATRIX <3.

<3
xx
-A

Dear You,

I know it hurts like nothing else. I can feel the rawness of your wounds in your words  I’ve been there. Nothing is more maddening and depressing then being with someone who doesn’t want to make love to you.

It’s absolute crazy-making.

You can’t help but to rewind back to how amazing it was in the beginning when all he saw and wanted was you.

Why can’t it be like that again? Will it ever be like that again?

I know how it all feels. I’ve been there.

And I can tell you this, I made it.

To the other side.

So what I’m going to say is what I would tell my younger self knowing what I know now. It might not be what you want to hear right now. But it’s the truth from my own direct experience.

.

This pain that you’re feeling.

This is not about him. This is about you.

.

Yes, his behavior is unsavory. And you can’t stop thinking about how in the wrong he is for not focusing his attention and energy in your relationship.

I get it.

And maybe you want me to tell you that he should be sorry and change for you, for the relationship.

But the thing is, that kind of thinking is what’s hurting you right now.

.

Keep this truism in mind:

Suffering is the difference between expectation and reality.

.

Right now you’re expecting him to be what he is not.

That’s what killing you.

.

I’m not saying he’s in the right and you’re in the wrong.

There is no right or wrong. And there’s no one to blame for how you feel. It’s everything that you’ve been through that’s making you feel this way.

.

To extingusin your pain, you must understand it. And to begin to understand it is to begin the process of understanding yourself.

So I need you to go far back. Think about every relationship you’ve been in.

Do you see a pattern?

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To be continued…

.

If you want to know where I’m getting at and want to do some self homework in the meantime, read this (with me):

Attached by Amir Levine (This book came highly recommended by multiple people when I was going through the rocky parts of my open relationship)

 

 

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Hello Ms. Collette,
I wrote to you a few years ago as I was just getting started as a young & budding Pro-Domme.  One prolonged abusive relationship later, and I feel I am full circle back where I started, just a few years older.  I have worked hard to find peace and physical health again after that experience, and deeply want to resume the life path which brought me such freedom, joy, and perspective. However I do not desire to return to the dungeon where I worked before, due to a sense of unease about how they conduct business and speak of women.  My ideal for a long time was to be independent. However, with no blueprint for this and in the midst of a destructive relationship, I found it impossibly difficult to achieve. My life is currently a blank canvas devoid of any direction other than what I give it.  I have always seen you as such an inspiration, for your artistic and liberating take on the world of domination and submission. What I would like to ask is if you would have any advice for someone in my position?

-N

 

Dear N,

I’m so happy you’re still here, reaching out to me. And I’m so glad that you’re out of that abusive relationship. Hopefully, it didn’t wound you too much.

I know it’s hard navigating this strange paradoxical terrain of starting out as a domme. You want to become a domme because you want to be in control. And yet starting out at a house, you relinquish that control. To some degree, you kinda have a boss. And if you clash with that boss in some way, aesthetically, professionally, etc. it’s just as bad as working at some place you don’t want to be, if not worse. Because a dungeon is a pretty much a space full of alpha females, who all think their way is the right way…

.

You inspired me to create this page on the Domme guide

.

To be continued

 

.

 

To whom it may (or may not) concern:
I want to be a dominatrix.
Professionally, but also carry that spirit with me in my day to day.
I want to wield a riding crop as casually and naturally and as often as I utilize my phone. I want to procure an endless smorgasbord of positively uncommon experiences, and be rich with time, freedom, and spirituality and provide utterly unforgettable, out of body experiences for my clients and myself; enchant them, and make them better for having seen me. And obtain a reputation within the community as being a person of honesty, warmth, and knowledge. As well as meet other people…friends, from around the globe… who are also living their best life, that I can learn from.
I want all of this because in my heart it feels like I was meant to do this. I don’t know why…
I’m drawn to underground societies by nature and crave to elevate the human experience. I want to be a dominatrix.
-R
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Hi Colette,

Thank you for this guide. It’s beyond heaven sent for me right now as I have been following this path (or rather, a path leading towards this path) for some time now (all my life, it feels like). You are speaking directly to me, as well as so many others who are searching for the same liberation in stepping up to the ownership of our sexuality and our full potential as humans. Thank you! I have a couple of questions (or, one hundred, but I’ll start with two):

1. How do you intuit/determine what scenes you are happy to proceed with?

2. How do you protect yourself energetically and elevate the experience into the spiritual realm?

With gratitude,
-A

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Why be a dominatrix?

To live the fullest expression of my sexuality. To understand & know compassion for the darkest and most hidden parts of the psyche. To venture far beneath the surface and learn to guide others there and back. To help myself and my family. To tie all of my interests together. To share my expression with others. To liberate and bind as a tool of sensual expression, rather than a tool of unconsensual oppression. Because I love to wear the clothing, use the tools, and keep the secrets. Because I love to paint myself across the canvas of another’s innermost fantasies. Because I am generous with my expression of femininity, regardlessbof those who tell me not to be. To have the time and energy to discover my art and poetry. To shift paradigms powerfully.

-N
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Looking to explore more about the lifestyle and safe spaces for me to express a more sexually and spiritually free self. I’m in NYC and although I’ve been interested in the idea of sexual play, roles and the like I haven’t felt comfortable or safe to express it. Do you have any suggestions for me as to where I may find people who are truly open, accepting and judgement free or a place I could experience what its like to be a dominatrix here? I’d greatly appreciate it. Just trying to discover all of me.
-A
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I can’t put your writings down.  I feel life and freedom in them.  I need to feel your love.  In one of your writings you stated we need to give to our biggest fear.  Mine is submitting to electricity.  Please set me free. My biggest fantasy is to please you in front of a crowd perfected in public.  Maybe someday mistress. It is so hard to wait.  I need to have something strke my flesh to relief me.    God help me until that time comes.
-J
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how do I know I am gay?
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Please tell me how you ease me into submission
-J
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Hi Colette,
I am 31 yr old male living in the Bay Area, quite fascinated about bdsm but too scared to try out real time. In my mind I want to humiliated and worship a woman’s feet and ass, literally the ground she walks on, but I’m too scared to try it out in real life…
my privacy is very important to me and I don’t want the world to know about my interest.. do you have any suggestions for me ?
-R
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Dear Mistres,
I  hope you remember me.
I wrote you a  time ago an e-mail and you answered, that in the future, when you have time, you will send a detailed response.   I will retransmit this email to remind you, little detaile about me, if it has been deleted.  I want to tell you that there are times when you owermaster me. I watch your pictures, your movies, read what you wrote. Please forgive me.  I love your mind, I like your body.  I am addicted to your veins from your hands. This fatal combinatin that you have, of wisdom, beauty, veins fetish, and dominance. But I look at your veins from your hands and  I don’t know what to do. I hope that you understand me. This fetish for veins. I hooe to kiss your veiny hands. Oh God. Please understand me Mistress.  Your strong, veny hands, full of tendons and blue and prominent veins.
Dear Mistress Colette,
I’m glad to have this opportunity to write a few thoughts and ideas.
I will start by apologizing for the spoken language and grammatical mistakes. I am not an english speaker, but I try to do my best.
There had to be, to meet a woman like you. Because you are unique., with your brilliant mind, with the knowledge of writing, with the deep understanding of human nature , with your perfect body,
all these qualities of yours, make you a special being . You are among the few persons who have the power of observation, see the big picture and understand the meaning of life.
The most beautiful thing that can happen to a man, is to meet a special woman. You have everything could God  give to a woman. A deep and sharp mind and a beautiful body. It can be said that the gods were giving you a gift. Yes indeed.
I read much of everything that you wrote,  here on Pervette, as best as I could. (as I said, I’m not an Shakespeare’s descendant). I listen your beautiful voice ( a Dominatrix smokes toad venom and loses her ego) I looj at your pictures and videos again and again. Yes, again and again. You don’ t whant to know how you make me feel. How deep you are in me.
There is another aspect. Your beautiful big blue veins that pierce your skin, your muscles, tendons.Veins that interweave between your tendons and your beautiful muscles. Sometimes, for me, is a powerful fetish. Yes your veins from your feet, from your hand. Scuse me that I was so direct and uninspired. But I had to tell you how excites me and knead me your veins.
It may seem stupid to you  but at least I was honest with you. In all aspects.
Maybe you will have time for me. I will try to talk to you without getting you tired.
At least tell me what I must do, to talk with you, to have more of you, to feel you,  to know much of  yourr beautiful mind, to see you, to be closer to you. Please understand me.
In finally I thank you  for your time, if you read these words.
-O
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Hello Mistress
I’m looking for a dominant mistress who could give me some punishments.
It’s difficult to find a good mistress but I think I have found one with you.
I Wanna find myself naked and bounded, submited to your authority and willigness.
I really would like to meet you in Paris, i’m motivated.
Best Regards.
-R
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I would be honored to meet you and to serve you. Looking forward to that day Mistress.
-J
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I beg you to humiliate and use me. Use me to amuse yourself as you emasculate and humiliate me with your strap on. Take my masculinity and tell me I will never be able to cum again unless your strap on is in my ass..
-R
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I’m looking for that special Dominatrix to serve but don’t know just where to go. I have a very shy type of personality & feel uncomfortable in large crowds. And so I feel kinda stuck in between a rock and a hard place. If I had lots of money I would surely waste it on that special lady! It’s also been a very long time since I’ve had an orgasm & would like if you could tell me how to experience that wonderful feeling of euphoria again? Thank you for assisting me in this matter Ms. Colette.
-D
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what you’ve been writing—
and the quality of your writing
amazing AF!
don’t stop.
keep going.
don’t be afraid.
you’re beyond that now.
keep
writing
keep
writing.
-Q
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My dearest Domina Colette, I have an everlasting drive to really be at your disposal. My fantasies run wild everytime I log in here & I like to share them with you as my close Mentor Dominatrix that you are! I love your exotic pictures & they make me want to be right there in your midst! Please know that you are the only pro Domina that I share this with & I hope that you stay well off. Thank you…
-D
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Here my question is that I want to be submissive slave but when I am going to look any mistress so I see mistress is giving much more pain to there slave and most of Mistresses are hungry for only money. I approached to some of Mistresses but they don’t want to listen without taking there tributes, I don’t know how to explore my fantasies??? I’m in relationship with a girl she is very good and I love her so much but she didn’t know about my dark fantasies. I’m too confused should I tell my fantasies to girlfriend or not because I don’t want to lose her or I keep trying to search a good mistress? Please advise me.

Thanks & warmest regards

-P
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What is a poor starving curious grad student to do? I wish I could talk with you, I have once in the past, but I guess its pretty obvious it would be a waste of your time. Should I sell out and work in the Valley? on the Street? Vomit?

I worry Im gonna grow old and wretched never having explored this rabbit hole. Sometimes I am resigned to thinking that in some other life we might be friends. Is it weird that I think I’d like to be a friend of yours? I think this probably results from how much of yourself you share, how honest you seem. I would very much like to meet  you, though right now I don’t think it would be worth your time in the traditional sense. Should I just piss off?

-J
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I found your name in the NYT this morning.  I like the way you write and sound. I am trying to find my voice.  I was not allowed to speak when I was little. I married a man who broke my rib.  I am doing so much and growing and learning and I only to keep growing and learning.  I’ve been with lover for 9 months and I still can’t tell him what I want.  I want to learn to use my voice, my powers.  For me to completely open up I worry about judgment.  My intimate regions are the most precious to me and I don’t want to be put down like I have for most of my life.  In my fantasies I am a powerful woman, an athlete, one who commands respect.  But in bed I give and don’t talk and I am happy and yet I’d like other parts of me to come forth.  Each time I tell myself to try.  And I can’t muster the nerve. I am determined to keep at this.

I am writing you to learn how to access the power I have, the power that left an abusive marriage, the power to be fit, the power to raise a son on my own, the power to take 3 graduate classes while being a mom and getting a 3.80.  Where is all that power in the bedroom?

Thank you for this website.  I am hoping to learn more.

-S

.

 

.
Hi … I’m turning 50 in August and want to wake up, claim some woman I have a shadowy sense of. I am wondering if you could work with me to grab onto this.
-S
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I want to take the path to serve you .. I want to suffer and I want to see you making me begging and suffering .. I want to be your slave forever
-K
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I want to be mesmerized and fractionated by an alluring, mysterious woman.
-P
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Without heistation, I want to go deeper, fall in knees and serve. That my commitment, give my trust, and service, stop being rogue, stop thinking of being switch, surrender, and learn the path. Learn to obey, Learn to stop thinking in pleasure, learn to give, learn to tolerate pain and suffer.

I want to keep going down into the rabbit hole and never go out. be lock inside and just wait for command. I want to learn be totally submissive. Mistress.

-E
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I’ve just started experimenting with swing a dominatrix with my boyfriend. And I would love to know more.
-C
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Dear Miss Colette,

My name is Jen. My boyfriend and I have wanted to expand our sex and personal life for a while now. Due to my previous relationships, I have always been a sub. My boyfriend has quite a domineering personality inside and outside of the bedroom and after being together for a while, I believe we fall perfectly into the Dominant/submissive lifestyle that I crave. Recently though, he asked me if we could switch roles. He told me he wants me to be his mistress. I was confused at first because he never expressed interest in switching before but after we talked it out, he said it was because he wants to see how assertive I can be. I am not uncomfortable in switching roles, I just don’t know where to start or how to start. I think a switch in roles would benefit our relationship. I would love some advice on how I be what my boyfriend needs me to be, his Mistress. Any advice at all would be appreciated on how I can take this next step in our relationship without being the one to ruin it.

Yours truly,
-J

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how i can be a voyeur?
-K
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Why is it that a genuine beautiful smile destroys me? When I see someone with a certain purity I want to back the hell away before I make them like me: cynical, depressed, pessimistic, catastrophizing, numb.  I starve for what they have but I can’t go back to feeling like they do, I’m told I must have at one point but I don’t remember. I will give them everything I have and I will suffer in silence, I will put on the happiest of faces to try to match theirs. But sooner or later ..sooner or later
-J
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Dear Mistress,

I want to find a woman who can control me, who can draw my innermost desires and anxieties to the surface. I genuinely love being a sissy, and would love to dress-up and go out together with you. Pegging is pretty big deal, but it’s not the be all end all for me. I love humiliation and being degraded. I also love eating ass. Any form of female of domination aside from fire, needles, and anything that inflicts permanent bodily harm is cool with me. I want to find a women that I can give control too, but who also wants to explore a truly mutual relationship. I want to give you pleasure and satisfaction in whatever way I can. I’ve come here to fulfill a sense of emptiness that all my other relationships couldn’t fulfill.

-L
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Dear Domina Colette,

I’m struggling with low self-esteem, because I want to be in a submissive relationship with you, but I can’t reconcile that desire with the feeling of inferiority that would come over me in a session with you.

Can you offer any guidance to a novice, who struggles with these feelings?

-E
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I’ve been seeing professionals for many years.  And its always a pleasure.  But the sessions I reflect on often were a handful where I was definitely out of my league.  Pros who either said no limits in the first place, or said it after I was already tied up.  I let them do things I would never have gone along with; clamps, electricity, whips.  It was exhilarating.  But I don’t know how to ask for that, because I’m afraid of it especially with a new person.  What’s a sub to do?
-T
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I’d like to learn how to communicate my desires and lose myself (maybe finding a truer self in the process?)
-O
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Mistress,  You have a beautiful site.  I read Your words and was aroused instantly.  I want to kneel at Your feet, kiss them , and submit to your beauty and your power. Unfortunately I live on the East coast (in Boston) but hopefully will have an opportunity one day to kneel at Your feet.
Sincerely,
-S
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YES i am fascinated by Your mysterious look, an impressive and real MISTRESS
-S
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This is so delicious. I didnt know I would feel so…in it. But I’m hanging on your words here. This learning – this sharing – the lead the goes where is known…the one that follows and is shown. This is the sexiest thing. I want to see us all stripped of our shames. I want to know how to bring myself and be with others in feeling, embodying the rawest most essential yesness of this Living. I want to know what these feeling can release and express.  I’m excited to learn from all of this – I think I have much to. And I want to see what I can offer; for now it is a trust of the whole thing, where this is going. I want to learn to follow and to follow It.
-B
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I love checking in with you efter every tiring day to you, Ms. Colette; you help to greatly enhance my libido as I read your outstanding poetry & leadership as a professional dominatrix! I have never in my life wanted to submit so much unto a woman of authority & I wish that we could somehow get together on this work that you are promoting. All I can say to you is to please keep on keeping on but not to tire your wonderful self in the meantime etc. Love you much…
-D
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Did you ever take a moment to view yourself in your most dominating positions of control and pleasuring yourself at the expense of a sissy sub?
-S
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Who are you?
Yes please….. I’d like to find out more about you….A total fan of dress up ( you) role play with hard tease.
-S
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I have not been or even laird beside a lady for years now & I am so doggone, well, you know what? All I can really do is to imagine with my creative mind to have a lady of Dominance teaching me how to truly behave & to be loyal towards her instead of just fascinating this type of dream world that I only know of. I hope & pray that you understand Ms. Colette? I am a very lonely guy & cannot stand it much more etc. That’s all.
-D
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Dear Mistress,

I’m very impressed with your photos and profile. You are so stunning and dominant.  I’m interested in body worship, BDSM etc. and  would love to serve as your slave. It would be an honor to talk with you further. What is the most convenient time for you, Goddess?

Patiently awaiting your instructions,
-G

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I just got here but feel at home. Brava for pulling that off digitally.

I want to go deeper always and immediately but need a guide. I’d love your help.

-S
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There are too many distractions in the world. Your presence brings a quickening of my pulse, a chill too my hands, a drying of my mouth . Your presence brings me into the moment and blocks everything else out.
J
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I love your website & enjoy being on it daily; I love women very much, especially those in power that care to listen to my deepest desires & instincts etc. All I ask of you is to keep me informed of how to approach “Alpha” type ladies & not screw things up by mind manipulation. I can be quite bad at times but on the other hand I can be pretty vulnerable personality wise. I hope you understand Ms. Colette. Thank you…
-D
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Domina,
This site is amazing. Your secrets and the raw honesty in which You share them are incredibly rare these days (…and only getting worse it seems).Thank You for being so open and vulnerable. If only the rest of us could understand the power of Your vulnerability. It is the opposite of weakness.

And yet I read Your “My Secrets” post, deeply empathizing with the need to be percieved as this ‘perfect-person’ to everyone, knowing I am unlikely to ever find Your same courage to live as openly. But I know Your short post was part of a longer, more complex journey. Perhaps I will get there someday, but only because of people like You that light the path.

I have no requests for anything different. Just more of You, and Your soulful art.

Thank You, sincerely.
-A

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destroy me

-V

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I want to access my dominant side and learn how to assert my will with confidence and compassion.
-K
.

Its hard to know where to go in this for me.  I know you, now, from both places on your spectrum.  Is there room for me to be playful here?!  I feel like I need to ask consent.   Could you program that in to WordPress?!

Love what I’ve found so far.  I will continue down the rabbithole!

-D
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What I want
to know is how to connect with more people like us, all here now, in Do Good Things with Power… what I want to feel is ease in my belonging and tribe building, more time to play and explore my dominance, I want to feel my power is creating a better world, I want to feel I am enough to make the difference my heart wants to make. I want the love inside me to be a contribution in a specific and meaningful way.
-Z
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I want to know more about learning how to release control and being in the moment.
-A
.

How do I describe the fear and trepidation, anxiety and trembling that envelopes my desire to be naked and exposed, vulnerable and open to your pleasure and whim, even if at the expense of my pain?

How do I ask to be spread and bound, teased and aroused and then tormented and tortured?

How do I describe the line on which I want to be made to dance, straddling the limits of want and desire with the constant, relentless and ever increasing pressure of your whip laid upon my most tender possessions, pushing me to gasp, to cry to shed real tears?

How do I give you permission to push past my limits till you break me and allow me to crumble at your feet, broken, defeated and willing to accept more whim and caprice?

How can I accept that my pleas of “no more”, and “Please have mercy, Mistress”, really mean: turn the current up even higher, apply the crop even harder, drip the wax even closer, squeeze my balls even tighter, spit into my mouth even deeper, force me to drink your nectar?

How can I want so much what I fear so deeply?

How can I give you all of me and please you fully?

-E
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How can I survive half a world away from you?
-T
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i am a lowly male creature whose wishes are to submit, obey and, amuse.  Is there more?
-B
.

Anticipation

Exquisite tension

The moment the intellect quiets

And the orgasm is what we are

Not what we do

-G
.

I want to go down this rabbit hole and experience all the things it has to offer.  How do we continue this encounter.  How can I serve you?

.
Don’t Stop
Just wanted to say I love the feel of this place… Truly…
-J
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Love is the child of poverty and gluttony.

It is the space between having nothing and having everything.

It is the desire to pro-create in beauty.

Biological love produces children.

Emotional love, poetry and art.

Intellectual love, philosophy and laws.

-C
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Love is connection. Love is spirit. Love is warmth. Sometimes love is pain. Love is our soul telling us we’re not alone.
-J
.

Love is what many will pursuit without really knowing or being able to define what it is. Love resembles a deep feeling of admiration, respect, dedication, and trust, but is not inherently the combination of theses. Love takes a long time to develop, but can shatter in an instant without warning. Every moment spent with one you love feel special and unique, making you looking towards the next moment together.

Love can be hard to talk about to the subject of your love. It can strengthen relationships, it can break them. It can make you feel miserable, it can make you feel as if your life is worth living. It can blind you away from problems in your relationships. And the absence of it can also blind you from how meaningful a relationship can be, outside of what your expectations from what a relationship should be.

Love and sex both require putting yourself and your partner in a position of vulnerability to happen. Both often coexist, but are not mutually inclusive. If one loves in order to have sex, they are not handling love well. But if one has sex only because they love, they are not handling sex well. Both can coexist in the same relationship or through different relationships. Outside of the scope of our highly monogamous patriarchal society, they are not correlated, and are simply two components of the relationships one can build.

Love hurts, and it makes you crave that pain.

-A
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No, Colette. That is not what love is.

Love is a mystery that lasts a lifetime. It’s worse than that: It’s a mystery that will, ultimately, if you let it, kill you. But only if you are so lucky.

Love is not sunshine that vanishes as soon as a cloud appears. It is the sunlight, yes, but it’s also the thing that chases away the sunlight, and it’s the thing that waits, knowing the warmth will return. Love is also the return.

Love is clean underwear, sure, but it’s also the shit-stained fabric you make clean again. It’s the snores you endure, knowing a good shove would help you sleep. It’s the forgetting of the snores every next morning. It’s the lies you discover and the decision to, what the fuck, keep this liar in your life.

Love is enduring the lies, the knowledge your other has a self s/he didn’t want you to see. Love is the decision to confront the lie, the decision to endure it, or the choice to slip down the rabbit hole of denial.

Love is madness. Love is the mystery owning you. Love is the complete surrender to the mystery/madness that is Love.

Love is being willing to lose yourself to Love, its nothing, its everything. Love is realizing that losing yourself means you becoming nothing.

And freaking out about that.

And then finding your true self, realizing you are actually everything.

Love is, therefore, strange.

-I
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C! I Never knew of this portal.
It’s exceedingly seductive.
You are offering a space that allows extreme choice without judgement..  I want to to learn more with you about your unique teachings. Very Truly Yours
-R
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I was fortunate to be trained by Mistress Xia for several years. In the years science she retired I have not found anyone so ….incredible. Would you consider consider consider me for continued training?
-T
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C,
This is a pretty cool site/concept/execution.
i like it a lot and would indeed enjoy seeing it grow out.Just a nuts and bolts; i was reading enthusiastically on the page mentioned in the subject line, and when i got to the hook for the continuation, up came a 404!

So not sure if that is something broken, or if that is as far as the road presently goes; regardless, that is a path i would like to go further down, as it seems we presently exist in a storm of change, almost everywhere.

Again, this is pretty cool, good luck with it!

-K
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Will u make me your friend
-A
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dear MISTRESS PERVETTE,
take my hand and lead me!
i so trust YOU!
please, YESS MISTRESS!
dear MISTRESS PERVETTE!
sorry, that i am here again…
i really will do the Praying in right wey.
so please, help me!
must i have clothes on or naked?
wher must i have my hands?
where must i look?
or Eyes clothed?
whispering or tell it in silence…?
thank YOU for helping me.
-J
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I fantasize about forced feminization, being dressed up and tied up helplessly and then made up like a slutty bitch ….. knowing all I can do is strain at my restraints …… and feel the helplessness and humiliation as my nipples are clamped with clover clamps and relentlessly maneuvered ……. until I agree to my Misstresses every wish and command ……. and I try …… and I try ….. but I am not worthy of my Domina Goddess ……. but I try and try ………
Defiantly Submissive ….
-R
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Hi Colette,
I liked your website very much; elegant and intelligent. I’m very curious about the avenues of BDSM, having lived like a monk for 45 years. I’ve had a rich esoteric life, which has taken shape as film scripts, a book and some short stories. You are welcome to see the stories, which are not erotic, but rather explore the possibilities for human consciousness. As someone who has a strong physical presence but who has been in the deepest meditative states, I am at a crossroads about how to operate in the world – as a person with multifarious perspectives but also with a functioning body too!Thanks for your consideration.

-J

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I don’t know what this is, but I like the tone. I just emailed you about Tokyo fetish stuff. I’m also curious about finding wisdom and I liked your tone last we met. Like I said, I don’t know what you’d like from me, but I am keen to know more about the process and to become a part of whatever this turns into. At the moment it looks like a cool experiment which, to me means no expectations, which in turn tends to lead to good things (which is itself an expectation, but let’s not dwell).

This is totally unrelated to my previous request. I’m just keen to see where this project goes. Let me know what I can do for you — I can offer you my words and experiences.

Whatever happens. I hope this project brings you much.
Cheers,
A

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Dear Mistress Colette,

I am happy that I found your site Pervette.com.  I have read most of it.

You probably do not remember me.  I came to see you at the end of 2013, Gloves and Ball Busting.  I thought you were exceptional in your mastery of the psychological side of connecting.  I still remember you getting the little CBT device off, insisting to choose between the right or left testicle to save, and being to nervous to the point of ED – which was really embarrassing.

I am sorry to hear that you were outed by your sister.  I am still in San Francisco, but have not kept in touch because I had a serious illness in the family (over) and then I have to learn my new job (still), but I remember you really fondly.  I just wanted to encourage you to continue on the journey, and I am looking forward to your postings.

Please keep in touch.  I look forward to seeing you again.

-M
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Greetings Mistress,

I love your profile, I adore your beauty, elegance and intelligence. Even I love meditation, your philosophy syncs up with mine. I was amazed by your amazing website. Slaves like me don’t deserve anything, unless you feel generous. So here are my list of skills and knowledge , which I would be honored to put in use for you.

Digital Marketing : I have learned this through via self learning online and I do learn it every day. I am well aware with the Google ad tools, keywords, Instagram marketing and marketing on various other social media sites. For example you could use few more hashtags on each of your posts for better. I can optimize the hashtags combine them with various femdom hashtags for better results.
My style is not sharing about you on my page. It will be done via digital marketing. So I can really help with all your social media platforms Mistress.
What I mean is I will be suggesting you few changes in your Instagram account( or other social media platforms like Twitter, fb, snapchat, site/blog) like hashtags usage, when to post, how many posts in a day, etc,. Targeting the potential audience so that you get more followers.

Photo editing : I can enhance/edit pics add signature, captions on them.

Writing : I can write, haven’t started but I will soon start a blog. As I read a lot, it’s just a byproduct apart from the transforming knowledge from those books.

Apart, from all these I read a number of books on self help, personality development, entrepreneurship, business, marketing, finance, relationships and health. And not to forget “Law of Attraction”. I will be honored and always willing to share my knowledge on all the topics any time.

Along with this I am also a fast learner and always interested in self learning. So any topic or field I will be enthusiastic and curious to learn it and use it for your good. Also please feel free to give me vanilla life tasks, I will be completely discreet. I assure you that I will put in my best efforts to complete any task given to me.

Coming to previous sessions, I was not able to serve anyone because I am not able to tribute to as INR to USD or Pounds would not be a significant amount. That’s why I am offering my skills instead, also I am looking for a long-term and genuine bdsm D/S relationship, if everything works out.

Thanks!!

-H
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I started lost, themes changing faster than I can draw breath… I hold tight to this feeling that something is missing… I let go gently to the ideas that hold me in isolation and fear.  I look to you for inspiration. First captivated by your beauty and creativity. I was compelled to follow a link on your instagram (not a regular practice of mine). I am intrigued and enlivened by your project. I would gladly co-conspire with you.  Life is an adventure of choices. Even if we don’t connect, I am pleased with the gift you gave. Thank you.
-M
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So…I feel like I have so little to offer, in that I’m a middle aged male, in Kansas, in reasonable athletic shake other than the whole cancer thing, who owns a house, and does well in a Kansas economy…

… but having stumbled in, and feeling like my entire world view has been overturned, who wants to devote my life to supporting and serving you…

I almost didn’t write at all.  I don’t like making promises unless I have something to offer to keep them… but I saw your prayer, and this page, and I’ve already resolved myself to praying to you daily and thought maybe I should just simply ask what you think i should do.

Although, my first piece of advice to myself would be, that I’m much better at concise sentence construction when I’m not writing at 5am heh..

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There is so much running through my mind and my heart right now that I don’t know where to begin.  And I certainly don’t have the time to sort through it all to put words to it right now, yet I had to say something.

But, even in this nascent stage, you deeply moved me.  The level of hope (and to a lesser extent, sadness, though that’s not your doing), expectant excitement, inspiration… it’s near overwhelming.

I have more I’ll want to elaborate on beyond the vague platitudes as soon as I can sort through them, in a manner that is no governed purely by impulse.

But seriously, Thank you.

-D
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I’ve always just been a regular guy with regular, happy vanilla girlfriend/boyfriend relationships. But for a long time, I’ve had some kinky fantasies. And those fantasies have evolved, but I have still never been with a Mistress for a session even though I dream about it. Nowadays, I imagine being forced to wear panties, stockings, etc. like a sissy, and forced to worship a Mistress and her big hard dildo. I imagine her making me suck on it, and making me look at photos and videos of guys with big hard cocks while she calls me names like sissy faggot and cock worshipper. Obviously, I also have cuckold fantasies in which I’m forced to watch my girlfriend with a lover, or something like that. My question is, do you do any sessions for situations like this, and what kind of session do you recommend. Thank!!
-W
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I wrote a song — inspired by you called, “Nobody like you” I didn’t hear back from you, but it’s only been a year or two so I’m still waiting.
-J.