fuck
it’s no use
you’re going in loops
you can’t help yourself
you keep cursing
fuck this pain
you want it to stop fucking up
your plans
your life
you keep wishing
it would just fuck off
and you can get on with your day
but nope
it’s still there
turning everything into shit
.
this pain is driving you crazy
it’s making you run away
it’s making you go numb
it’s making you reach for something1the bottle, the phone, the pipe, pick your poison
to distract yourself from the pain
.
you don’t want it to get to you
so you do everything you can to not feel it
(you keep on secretly wishing it would just go away)
.
.
.
.
after some time has passed and nothing has changed
you realize this pain is not just gonna go away2is it just you or are you spinning around in an infinite loop going nowhere fast?
running away from it seems to to actually prolong it
distracting yourself from it or going numb
is making you become the person you don’t want to be
something has to change
so you stop trying to avoid the pain or pretend it doesn’t exist